Amy Vaughn:
Hello, everyone, and welcome to our weekly power lounge. This is your place to hear authentic conversations from those who have power to share. My name is Amy Vaughn, and I am the owner and chief empowerment officer of Together Digital, a diverse and collaborative community of women who choose to share their knowledge, power, and connections. You can join the movement at togetherindigital.com. And today, I’m so excited to have you all here with us today because we are in for an insightful hour exploring how to source your power from within. And we are thrilled to have with us Jay Shetty Certified. I didn’t say that right, did I?
Tian Philson:
It’s alright. It’s alright. That’s the beauty of life. You can ride it back and run it Jay Shetty. Yes.
Amy Vaughn:
Jay Shetty certified coach and my friend, Tian Philson, who will guide us on the journey for our 2 authentic growth and help us to unlock our true selves and authentic selves, right? Our imperfect selves and embrace that.
Tian Philson:
Embrace it all. Embrace the messy. Embrace the messy.
Amy Vaughn:
So that whether you’re seeking more purpose, fulfillment or professional or personal development, this is a Power Lounge session that is for you. And I know again many of us in this space are as ambitious and digitally savvy as we all are, we love talking about these sorts of topics. We are going to explore some key takeaways such as understanding that your power comes from within.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
As Tian just reminded us, embracing the messy journey of growth and recognizing the Internet connection between authenticity and empowerment. So everyone, please join me in welcoming Diane. Thank you for being here today.
Tian Philson:
Thank you. That was lovely. It’s like you do this all the time or something. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
I had a little
Amy Vaughn:
practice. Like, practice makes perfect. You know? And even then, it’s not perfect, but that’s okay.
Tian Philson:
Or progress, whatever you’re aiming for. I am really trying hard to avoid perfection these days.
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah.
Tian Philson:
But I like practice. I like the practice now.
Amy Vaughn:
The practice too. You know? I don’t even know what perfect is anyway, so it’s fine. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly.
Tian Philson:
Well, thank you for having me. I’m super excited to be here. You and I have got to spend some time in person, and I really, really love your energy, and I love passion. And so the chance to come on here and just spend this time together this is my first time recording where there’s, like, an audience listening in this way. Yeah. You know, aside from, like, your typical Instagram lives or your Facebook things like that. So I’m excited for this part of it. This is new.
Tian Philson:
I like it.
Amy Vaughn:
Me too. You know, anymore, it feels odd when I don’t have a live listening audience and things just get recorded and kind of canned and edited for later. So I’m used to being unedited and unedited. So, yes, we do have a live listening audience with us today. Folks, don’t be shy. Drop questions, comments into the chat if you have them. If you are a regular listener of our recorded podcast, check out our website and always, you know, take the time. If you wanna listen live, we record every Friday typically at noon EST.
Amy Vaughn:
It’s a great time to be a part of the conversation, and we wanna be talking with you, not at you. So, Diane, let’s give everybody the chance to get to know you better. That’s exactly why I wanted to have you here because
Amy Vaughn:
Sure.
Amy Vaughn:
You know, that appreciation for the energy, the passion, and what you bring to the table is much the same. It’s very mutual. So you spent 20 years in corporate and in sales before you became a coach. Yes. And I know it probably wasn’t any one pivotal moment, but was there a pivotal moment or pivotal moments that made you realize that it was time for a change? What was that like?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. I love the question because it’s really, really awesome to go back and reflect on this. Mhmm. You hit it on the head. Like, right, there’s not just one moment. I think there are moments that lead you to take steps, little steps towards something that feels a bit more aligned, a bit more, like, a better fit. So I could probably run back, like, 10, 20 of those moments if I went piece by piece. But if I really think about those last few months that were leading up to the shift and the change, there’s 2 in particular that come to mind.
Tian Philson:
Mhmm. And one of those and so to take you back to let me get this right. May. No. No. Yeah. It was May. It wasn’t 22.
Tian Philson:
It was May of 2021. And, at the time, I was at 8451, which is an organization that I still love very much to this day. Mhmm. And they have this great process in the sales journey or the sales support process where you have, like, 5 conversations, like, 5 very deliberate career conversations with your manager. And, you know, one’s the midyear, one’s the end of year, and there’s a few check ins. So this was the May check-in. And I just remember not setting up the time because it’s the employee that’s supposed to set up the time with their people leader. And I just remember I just didn’t set it. I would not . I knew I needed to set up the time, and I wouldn’t set up the time.
Tian Philson:
I’m like, what is that about? You know, this is kinda far enough in my journey that I’m learning to listen and tune in and check-in and be like, what is going on here? So my manager takes the initiative, and he sets the time up with me so that we could have our conversation. And I came into the conversation, and I had nothing. I had nothing to contribute in terms of, here’s what I’m looking for next. I mean, we’d had, you know, various conversations prior to that about the types of roles or the types of work that I was hoping to do and some things that I loved about the current position, but some things that I was really ready to move on from. And so the fact that, like, for the first time in my career, like, I couldn’t even bring anything to the table to be like, well, let’s try this. Mhmm. That was a really big indicator.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
The other part of it is the morning before that meeting, I was trying to, like I was grappling with this fact that this person who’s always on top of her stuff has nothing to bring to this conversation, and I was asking myself why. And I started, like, drawing out. I don’t know if you are familiar with Chitin. I’m probably saying his name wrong. He’s got this flow state theory. Right? And it has to do with when your level of challenge relative to your level of skill or perceived level of skill relative to perceived level of challenge when it’s in the optimal place where you’re challenged just enough to grow.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
But, like, if you’re under challenged, you’re bored, and if you’re over challenged, it creates stress and anxiety, but there’s this really beautiful, optimal space for growth. And I was really trying to, like, explain that I was thinking about explaining this to my manager, and I I stopped myself, and I was like, this is not the place for that conversation. Like, this is not, I
Amy Vaughn:
I don’t know.
Tian Philson:
It just did not feel like a good fit. But what did become very apparent to me is I cared a lot about that idea. I cared a lot about those theories and those principles of motivation, and I cared a lot about, like, what drives other people to do what they do and how do we optimize it.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
And it’s like this light bulb light bulb went off, and I started scribbling on my notepad. And, basically, I was designing this idea of a role that looked like a coach, but I didn’t know what to call it.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
So that’s where it began. That was May 21st. By the fall of 21, I was enrolled in a coach coaching certification course. I was still doing my job every day, and I was still bringing my all. Mhmm. And of course. I was still doing my job every day, and I was still
Amy Vaughn:
bringing my all. Mhmm. But I was enrolling in this course because I was like, I
Tian Philson:
gotta do something with this, like, intention and this energy. Yeah. And then by March of the following year, March of 22, the other pivotal
Amy Vaughn:
moment was
Tian Philson:
me in meditation. Mhmm. I’ve been meditating about abundance. I’ve been meditating asking for clarity. And it was about 3 months before my birthday, and I just got this whisper in me that was like, what if you either found a new position
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Or took the leap altogether.
Amy Vaughn:
And it
Tian Philson:
was, like, this very subtle whisper, and
Amy Vaughn:
I was like, oh my gosh. Are we really doing this?
Tian Philson:
And those are the 2 big moments more towards, like, kind of the end of the journey that really led me to where I am now.
Amy Vaughn:
And that’s really interesting because I think I’ve talked to a lot of women, obviously, throughout the course of this podcast. And Mhmm. I think many times, we feel like it has to be some big pivotal moment, some massive tragedy or firing or, you know, signs, massive signs from the universe that tells us now is the time. This is the instance in which you have to do this. And
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
It sounds like for you, it was this sense of almost numbness, I would say.
Tian Philson:
Numbness, but, also, I really think that when our intuition is trying to guide us, it’s more of a whisper, but it’s a very clear
Amy Vaughn:
subtle. Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Right. It’s subtle, but it’s clear.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And and and I’m really I I I will wholeheartedly say,
Amy Vaughn:
I feel like I still have
Tian Philson:
lots of wonderful work to do on this journey of, like, really tapping into my intuition.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
But that is something that is being proved to me time and time and time again. It’s like when it’s clear Mhmm. It’s not like this messy, like, symbols banging. It’s this subtle whisper
Amy Vaughn:
Right.
Tian Philson:
Of your heart, your mind, your gut.
Amy Vaughn:
And you had to slow down for that. Right? I can imagine working in, you know, in sales and at a company as large as 8451, which if you’re not local to Cincinnati, they are a big data and insights company that does a lot in service with Kroger’s.
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And so, you know, that’s not a hugely competitive space, but it’s still high. It’s, you know, pretty. It’s busy.
Tian Philson:
It’s demanding. It’s challenging in all the yes. In all the best of ways. Yes.
Amy Vaughn:
So what was it that kind of got you to start? Were you always reflective and meditative, or was that something that you had to kind of grow into?
Tian Philson:
I definitely had to grow into it. I mean, even now, like, I have my moments. This morning was, like, kind of a chaos kinda moment where I found myself just a little bit all over the place, but now I can feel it. Yeah. Now I can feel it in my body and be like, hey. Hey. Girl. Slow down.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Slow down. It’s okay. But I’ve actually more so been the kind that’s, like, running a little too fast and tripping over her own shoes and whatever. That’s kinda my default if I’m being honest.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
It was an accidental discovery of yoga
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Which first brought me into this space. I was doing circuit training.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And the wind down or the slowdown from the circuit training was a p 90, like, the last tail end of the video, and they interspersed, if that’s the word. This yoga sequence is there. I guess it’s not interspersed. They brought it in. Whatever. This yoga sequence, and I just loved the way it felt to, like, stretch
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah.
Tian Philson:
And move my body. And I was like, oh, this thing right here feels good. It feels good. But even in the beginning, it was, like, heart hot, hard, and sweaty. Uh-huh. It felt good, but I was not yet in a place to slow my mind down and really tune into my heart. And so that took that took some time
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Like, over the course of months and years. And then I really started to embrace, like, the inner transformation of it into what it is today.
Amy Vaughn:
I think it’s one of those things I’ve learned too over time as I’ve gotten older. It’s like we are taught and told as women we are meant to look a certain way, feel a certain way, be a certain way, and we’re not meant to want or desire. And so often, like, I found I was really lucky. I I found yoga, I think, when I was in, like, my teens. I was 18.
Tian Philson:
Oh, nice.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. Ever since then and even as I’ve gotten older, I’ve definitely always chosen movement that feels good for both my body and my mind. And it’s not that I don’t want a challenge, but I also don’t want to put my body body under distress for the sake of making others more comfortable with how the
Tian Philson:
eye look. Right? Gotcha.
Amy Vaughn:
And so I have found things like yin yoga to be extremely wonderful. And that’s a longer, like, more floor supported yoga. And I know it’s usually a bunch of 80 something year olds doing it. I don’t give a damn, but I’ll tell you what. I can go out and I can do more high impact, high energy exercises and not get injured because my tendons and my ligaments are that much stronger because of the deep tissue that I’m getting at by doing longer stretches and more yin yoga. You know? And it’s one of those things just serving. If it serves your mind and your body and you get joy out of it, why do we deny ourselves? It’s like we just so often don’t put our energy towards the things that bring us joy. I think that’s something as I get older that I’m starting to pay more attention to, and I think that includes in the types and the types of the type of, you know, not just movement and exercise, but the kind of work that you’re doing.
Amy Vaughn:
And so I love that you did that. You saw that spark, and you thought, why am I so inclined to take my work review and turn it into a coaching session for myself? That is such a good point. That. You, like, you actually were coaching yourself, and you took note of that. You got curious and started to pull it apart.
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And now here’s the thing.
Tian Philson:
About it that way. That’s so insightful of you. Yeah. You totally did that.
Amy Vaughn:
And you did it in the moment, and then you took note of it. And I think, you know, it’s hard for us to see our own gifts, I think, oftentimes, because they come so naturally to us. It’s second nature. We don’t see it.
Tian Philson:
Say that again. Seriously. That is so real. Like, it is so real. It’s they’re hidden to us or blind to us because it feels so easy. Mhmm. And we almost dismiss it, and it takes either slowing down, like you said, or being open to the feedback of those that we trust, right, that have some credibility, which I think is an important Yeah. Aspect of that.
Tian Philson:
But, yeah. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
I love that
Tian Philson:
you solve that
Amy Vaughn:
in yourself. I love that you solve it yourself. So now that you are coaching and looking back at your experience in sales and consulting, how has it informed how you coach and how you approach wellness?
Tian Philson:
It’s actually really, really cool. And to be honest, so now I’m into like, I have now completed 2 full years, right, as an entrepreneur and doing this work full time. I think it was always there when I was doing yoga. So yoga was something I did alongside my corporate career for, like, 5 years before I did all of this full time. But now that I’m out of the sales career, I can look back and I can see just how integrated Mhmm. It all is. I think that the keyword is connection. Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
And I
Tian Philson:
I think that it’s connected in 2 particular ways. I think in one way, it’s a connection to the experiences
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Of what others that I think I’m really well positioned to help support.
Amy Vaughn:
Yes.
Tian Philson:
It’s a connection to what they might be experiencing or going through and how this can help serve them.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And then I think the other part is it’s a connection to my approach, essentially. And so when you’re in sales, you know, the one thing that kept me going for so long was a genuine interest in the needs of others. Yep. And so, like, how can you solve that gap, or how can you solve what’s missing? And that’s really at the artist at the heart of sales, you are providing a solution
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
To some sort of a challenge or problem. Now sometimes you’re creating, you know, or identifying a need for something because, hey, there is value. It’s like the iPhone. I don’t think anybody was going. I wish I had this smarter thing in my hand. Yeah. Right? But it did actually solve some issues. But, anyway, my point is the approach of sales Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Helps me approach coaching in very similar ways of, like, really being deeply invested in, like, what are the needs Mhmm. What are missing and how can I solve a challenge? Yep. So that’s probably, like, the big 2.
Amy Vaughn:
Ladies, what she’s talking about right there are transferable skills. Ah. I cannot tell you how many women I speak to that say, I don’t have x y z.
Tian Philson:
Yes.
Amy Vaughn:
I’m out there looking for a job in sales, but I don’t have x y z.
Tian Philson:
Yes.
Amy Vaughn:
And you could flip it and say, I’ve been coaching for 20 years, but I don’t have the skills to do sales. Guess what, Diane? You just proved them wrong.
Tian Philson:
They didn’t. Yeah. I love it. And you know what? It’s so fun because, like, when I’m working with my clients
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
We’re talking about various topics and things that they’re interested in. But oftentimes, I’ll hear some of those same themes Mhmm. Of like, well, I’d like to consider this, but I don’t have that.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And oftentimes, I’m bringing you back to, well, what do you have? And I’m really looking for evidence, and I’m looking for them to share with me and themselves out loud, like, the evidence. And a lot of times, they’ll actually start to think about it and go, well, actually Yep. Now that we’re talking about it, I do know this, and I do know this, and I have done this. And I’m just sitting back, and I’m going,
Amy Vaughn:
How about that? Listen.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. So yeah. Yeah. That’s common, though. I think, again, either something comes so easily that you miss it.
Amy Vaughn:
Hidden gifts.
Tian Philson:
Hidden gifts, or you don’t always give yourself the credit Mhmm. For the ways that it’s come about. Yeah. In a very similar or transferable way.
Amy Vaughn:
And I think, again, it just kinda comes to that just you know, I don’t know why women get that wrap or give themselves that wrap that they are not good at sales. Mhmm. But it’s like, you know, you just said it. You understand and meet the needs of others. Hello. How have we been conditioned?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Yeah. But you know what? I think it’s because, unfortunately, it’s weird. I mean, now that I’ve taken a step away from the traditional and corporate side of sales, I have, again, a new appreciation for it. But I think when you’re in it or when you feel like you have to step into it Yeah. It feels kinda dirty, if you will, or, like, undesirable. And you and it’s this negative connotation of, like, random slimy car salesperson. Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And that’s what you associate with sales because it has a negative connotation. But if you really step back and say, well, actually, how am I here to serve? Yep. Which is something that, thank goodness, in our coaching school, we really spent some time kind of, like, going deeper into its sales, when done with heart, is actually about service.
Amy Vaughn:
Absolutely.
Tian Philson:
And so I think a lot of times we lean into the negative connotation of sales instead of taking a step back and going, actually, there’s something really beautiful and really supportive in this opportunity, and I think that’s where it gets lost.
Amy Vaughn:
I agree.
Tian Philson:
Particularly, maybe more for women. I mean, a lot of studies and results say that.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Women tend to be more adverse, but I hear it from men too. You know? It’s like, I feel guilty for, you know, talking about myself or talking about what I can
Amy Vaughn:
offer. Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. And it’s like, actually but you’re helping to solve a need for somebody else. I know I’ve been there. Yeah. Definitely.
Amy Vaughn:
And it is at that point where it is making the ask. Right? It’s making the ask. It’s closing the it’s, again, it’s a terminology around it. It’s closing the deal. So I think it’s, like, internal dialogue, internal roadblocks, mindset. It’s all of those things.
Amy Vaughn:
Yes.
Tian Philson:
So you’re right.
Amy Vaughn:
I think it’s, like, once you start to change that sort of inner approach and how you see it and how you frame it in your mind, that it can really start to sort of change how you approach it and how you look at it.
Tian Philson:
Exactly.
Amy Vaughn:
But yeah. Yeah. There’s a lot of good stuff to unpack there, and it gives me lots of ideas. But we’ll move on to the next question. Okay. Because we could go down that rabbit hole. Could you walk us through a little bit about the journey of finding love, strength, and fitness, your business, and then what challenges that you faced in those early days? Because we’ve got a lot of entrepreneurs, and as I like to call them, those entrepreneurs are curious, whether they know it or not.
Tian Philson:
Sure. Sure. Yeah. I’d say it was a slow evolution.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
I think it was a very slow evolution first foremost because I didn’t set out to do this work full time. Mhmm. In fact, you know, I’m excited for when my husband gets to listen to this if he’s not listening already. We had whole argument
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
About, like you know, he’s like, you love this thing called yoga, and, you know, you think about you know, you wanna get your certification. Like, that can be a whole business for you. And I’m like, like, hit the brakes. Slow down. I have no interest. I don’t wanna do this as my career. And I just think that there was a point at which it wasn’t a real argument, but it was a heated debate. Sure.
Tian Philson:
And I was like, I don’t have a desire to be an entrepreneur. Mhmm. And so when I first founded Love Strength and Fitness, even then, I was kinda, like, hesitant on the idea of it being anything more than, something I did with passion alongside my, quote, unquote, safer
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
More aligned corporate career. And it’s funny because, you know, he really didn’t push the issue. He did, like, share his perspective, but this little seed, I think, started to plant in me, and it helped me challenge my own beliefs and my own ideas. So over time, the first step was, well, I am interested in getting a certification for yoga, whether it’s to go deeper in my own practice or whether it’s just to help others Yeah. Find their own pathway inward, right, through yoga specifically. And so I said, okay. I’ll at least get the yoga certification because that feels aligned. And then after I got the certification, I thought, I don’t want to lose. I have this thing about not wanting to waste my time or effort.
Tian Philson:
And after going through all that training Yeah. That’s a lot. Really concerned. Right? It’s a lot. I was really concerned that if I didn’t step out there and, like, engage with people publicly, that it would just be something that I did for fun and never put to use. Mhmm. So then it was like, you’re gonna teach a public class. I did it within 3 months of graduating because I knew otherwise I’d lose the nerve.
Tian Philson:
And just that for, like I said, 5 years. But meanwhile, this whole time, I’m also on my own journey, so I’m going inward. I’m going inward. I’m going inward. Mhmm. And over time, what I came to realize is yoga is amazing, and I love teaching yoga, but I didn’t feel like yoga was the entire answer.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
I felt like if I’m going to work with people on my own terms, I need something more to offer beyond yoga. So you fast forward to that May conversation that I was not excited to have. Uh-huh. And this light bulb that went off, and it was like, what if coaching what if coaching is that thing? And so by the time I enrolled in the coaching certification course, I was pretty well clear
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. That
Tian Philson:
this was gonna be more than just something I did on the side. I just didn’t know
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Exactly how and when and, you know, what it was gonna look like to bring it together. Mhmm. So that was the early stages of it. It was very much like slow progression Mhmm. Slow progression, challenging my own ideas, listening
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Listening to the fears that were coming up
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
And listening to also some of the pain I was experiencing. I mean, it’s the word pain, it can feel worse than what it is, but even just like, the discomfort of the day to day or the misalignment Yeah. The misalignment of, like, I really feel like I’m meant to be doing something different. Over time, the louder that voice gets, the more painful it got because I felt disconnected from my authentic self. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And let’s let’s just take a moment and acknowledge the fact that, you know, our brain doesn’t know the difference between physical and emotional pain.
Tian Philson:
Absolutely. Right? Absolutely. I was just listening to something that, like, really, validated that Mhmm. Based on, like, science. Yeah. Like, it really
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
It handles it the same.
Amy Vaughn:
100%. It does not know the difference. That and I just again, yeah, kudos to your partner. I think, you know, I think that’s always a question I have to anyone who is looking to start a business and make a big Mhmm. Leap like that. And, again, you know, you may not be in a relationship, but it’s like, what kind of support system do you have? Yeah. Starting a business is a big and scary and sometimes lonely endeavor. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
So whether that’s community, connections, family, friends, you know, a partner at home, what does it look like? What kind of support do you have? And I love that you have support, encouragement to take that.
Tian Philson:
It makes me think, “Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cut you off, but it makes me think of the exercise that you did with us Mhmm. During supper club, right, when you walked us through a networking exercise, and I actually really love the visual process of drawing those circles Yep. And connecting the dots between the roles that different people in our lives play. Yeah. And so to your point, maybe you do or don’t have a partner, or maybe they do or don’t get it. Yeah. That’s beside the point.
Tian Philson:
If you really sit down and think about the different levels of support that you have in your life from emotional support to technical Yeah. You know, people that know something, to people that are willing to challenge you Yeah. To those that are your inspiration.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Right? Like, you start to really draw that map out.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
You, I think most of us have more support than we realize.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. Yeah. I think I can imagine too the part of going inward, you know, requires obviously looking at not just your strengths, but your weaknesses. Right? Sure. Yeah. And acknowledging those weaknesses, and then you’ve gotta you gotta outsource some of that stuff.
Tian Philson:
Heck, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which is, to me, the hardest part of entrepreneurship and knowing how to outsource, I think.
Amy Vaughn:
Oh. Yeah. Absolutely. And I forgot to mention it earlier, but, yeah, 100%. We were talking about, you know, the sales and the icky feeling we sometimes get surrounding that. And as you were describing it, I mean, I think a lot of people feel that way about networking as well, but we just don’t realize how much of a benefit it is to and how much of how empowering it is to others when we help become connectors and get ourselves connected.
Tian Philson:
Right.
Amy Vaughn:
Right. Such an important thing to do. Like, you can’t grow your business without sales. You can’t grow your business without networking.
Tian Philson:
Absolutely.
Amy Vaughn:
And it’s not necessarily evil. They’re just absolutely essential, and they can actually be a way to thrive. And they can be joyful, and they can be fun.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. My number one kind of tip or recommendation around that Mhmm. Networking specifically is figure out a couple of your core values
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And then take the time to step back and see where your core values are actually being supported
Amy Vaughn:
in
Tian Philson:
that networking process. Me, personally, there’s 2. One, it’s a love of learning that I have. I call it growth, and the other one is connection.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Right? And so when I get to the network, I get to make new connections Mhmm. With others. I also get to connect, like, to your point, their strengths and skill sets with either those that I know exist within others, and so you can make that organic natural connection there.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
Or 2, getting to make a connection. I lost my train of thought there.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
But, whatever. I’ll leave it. I’ll come back to it if anything comes back to me. But, like, the other part of it is that growth, getting to learn something new about what somebody else does, what their journey was like, or or whatever. And so I think if you can lean into what your personal values are, there’s a way for you to, to your point, embrace and fall in love with the idea of networking for you.
Amy Vaughn:
I agree. I think values alignment was a big eye opener for me. I spent a lot of time networking with different associations, and it kind of always was like, okay. Yeah. I’m here, but it felt so transactional. And then Mhmm. Again, I wouldn’t be sitting here if I didn’t believe in it, but joining together digitally and then seeing that there was a mission and values beyond just meeting and greeting and business card passing. It was really about empowerment and knowledge sharing and connecting and building professional friendships, relationships beyond the job, I was like, oh, wow.
Amy Vaughn:
This feels so different. It feels different. So much more transformational than anything else. And so that was where I was like, okay. This is where I would rather spend my time networking than just kind of going to some trade show floor.
Amy Vaughn:
Do you
Amy Vaughn:
know what I mean? It just doesn’t feel completely different. So, yeah, I agree with you. I think that’s a great value. It makes a lot of sense.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Yeah. I’m just curious. I wanna ask you too, like, because I know networking is a topic that you have a lot of passion and heart for. But would you say that when you’re networking authentically, it’s almost hard to pinpoint the benefits that you’re gonna get? And so, like, to your point, transactional networking, it’s like, if I give you a, you’ll give me b. But I think transformational networking is I love your words, so I’m gonna repeat those words. Transformational networking, it’s almost like, there’s a level of abundance or possibility Yes. That is unknown to you Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Until you go through with it, and then you get to see, like, the outcome. Does that make the most sense? Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
100%. And I love that you brought that clarity to light. I because, yes, I, I’m not overly strategic when I approach people, because I know that there is possibility and opportunity within everybody. So I’m not overly selective because I find that to be an antiquated approach to networking. And I also find it to be what feels icky to a lot of people because it feels like you’re disqualifying people before you’ve given them a chance to meet them.
Tian Philson:
Right.
Amy Vaughn:
And so sometimes you might actually miss a pretty awesome opportunity by not giving people your time and energy and attention. I also find it to be what perpetuates, exclusivity, and a couple other things that I don’t necessarily care for in the way of it’s just perpetuating, and limiting opportunities for women, for people of color, for people with a certain socioeconomic status, which is also something, like, I just for the sake of inclusivity, I just don’t find those things, necessarily helpful in breaking down barriers, which is why I’m usually not big fans of, you know, communities that are only for people of a certain level, at in the workplace or, you know, executives only kind of things because I’m like, no. We need to let people in that are at all levels. They need access to those folks
Tian Philson:
Yeah. You know,
Amy Vaughn:
so that they may receive the opportunity. And I don’t care if you are an executive or somebody just starting out of college. I’m gonna give you my calendar link so that we can spend a half an hour talking to one another to find out how we can help support one another because they’re both deserving of each other’s time. You know?
Tian Philson:
You know what? It’s such a beautiful, just kind of, like, perspective
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
That you share, and it actually does make me think about what you said too about, like, the hidden gifts and the hidden potential Mhmm. Within others. I think to your point, there’s all these, like, selective and exclusive approaches that people have to how they engage with others, but I don’t care who you talk to. I don’t care about their background, their education level, where they come from, whatever. Everyone has something really powerful
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah.
Tian Philson:
And really meaningful to offer. And if you slow down and take the time to listen Mhmm. And genuinely be interested and genuinely be curious in their story
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah.
Tian Philson:
You will walk away, shifted, impacted, changed in some positive way, and it doesn’t matter to your point, the title or, you know, how many years of x, y, and z they had. Yeah. What matters is their authentic gifts, and sometimes Mhmm. Yeah. It yeah. I could go with one that’s a salt box for me. So
Amy Vaughn:
I know. Right? Same. Same.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. I know. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Alright. Let’s, let’s see. The next question I had for you was, being both a certified Jay Shetty coach and yoga instructor, how do you blend these seemingly very different disciplines into your work? Because you were kind of going on about how, you know, you did the yoga instructor
Amy Vaughn:
Uh-huh.
Amy Vaughn:
And then you were at work, and you were like, oh, yeah. Coaching. I think I wanna pursue this. So how are you kind of working those two things together now?
Tian Philson:
You know what? I’ll tell you. It is still in evolution in terms of, like, how they actually come together. But what I fundamentally believe and one of the reasons why coaching felt so aligned for me Mhmm. Is that in both cases, you are taking yourself on a journey inward.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
In one case, you roll out a mat, and you get on that mat, and you sure. You’ve gotta guide you through the teacher, but it’s really about the feedback that you’re getting from yourself within. And then coaching is really no different except, you know, you don’t have to roll out a mat. We pull up a chair to each other, or we hop on the phone or a Zoom or whatever the case may be, and you engage in a journey Mhmm. A conversation where you get to go inward to source your own truth and your own answers. And so to me, they are actually very well linked and very complementary to one another. What I’m trying to learn now as as, you know, the steward of this beautiful work is I’m trying to learn because right now, I feel like the amazing humans that I engage with from a coaching perspective, kinda live just in my coaching bubble, and then the amazing humans that I engage with from a yoga perspective pretty much live just within my yoga bubble. And I’m really trying to understand where the points of overlap do exist.
Tian Philson:
Mhmm. And that’s everything from my actual services to, like, literally, I’m relaunching my website because they were 2 separate entities in the beginning. And it Yeah. Yeah. That’s all of it. I do think that they complement each other very much, but you have to be intentional and deliberate about how and when you bring them together.
Amy Vaughn:
Well, I guess we need to connect you to some of our Together Digital ladies, like, Donal in Denver who does some pretty awesome, like, websites and San Diego who does some branding in Orlando. Yeah. If you don’t have some help there already, we’ve got some really amazing women who do some awesome work there in those spaces. Yeah. I could see that. I do think, you know, for me, I think that whole mind body connection is Mhmm. To me feels like an opportunity because I think those of us who do live and work in the professional world Sure. Spend Sure.
Amy Vaughn:
All of our time up here.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. For
Amy Vaughn:
those who are just listening and not seeing me right now, I’m pointing at my head. Yep. You know, we spend all of our time in our minds and never, like, attached to our bodies.
Tian Philson:
Yes.
Amy Vaughn:
And, you know, I I know this because I spent, you know, 14 years in the advertising world and was working as a creative director, and, you know, I spent a lot of time working to numb, you know, and just really even though I discovered yoga at 18, you know, I went off to college, took a gap year, year and a half, and then went right back into it really aggressively, worked full time, went to school full time at night, and, you know, just kind of left all that behind and forgot about it for a long time and then had to come back to it because I was in severe burnout
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
And, you know, needed to be reminded. And I think it’s just such an essential thing. And then it got to a point where I remember I used to block my calendar every afternoon instead of going to reach for the caffeine at 2 o’clock, 3 o’clock in the afternoon. I started going and doing an afternoon yoga stretch and meditation in one of the little huddles every afternoon in my at my agency
Amy Vaughn:
so
Amy Vaughn:
that I could just get that little bit of boost of energy back because I would be so in between all of the socialization and the conversations and ideation. And my brain would just be spinning like a top, and it would be hard to get it to really slow down. I knew I’m, like, so far into my head. I need to get back into my body. Yeah. I literally you probably could have, like, stabbed me with a knife, and I don’t even know if I would have felt it because I was just so in my head. Right?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Wow.
Amy Vaughn:
And so it’s just really making sure that you know how to get back into your body.
Tian Philson:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
And then sometimes I feel like, you know, other times I can totally detach from, you know, my body and then, like, or be in my body so much that, like, getting my brain to just focus and be present and be attentive like attention. Sometimes it’s, like, getting the opposite is hard as well. So, like, kind of having that balance and being attuned to when you’re too much in one or the other
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Is definitely a thing. So I can really see how, you know, yoga practices within, and understanding mind-body connection within an office space and understanding and regulating your nervous system while in an office environment is really essential for people.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And I know it feels a little woo for some folks, but when we deal with the amount of stress we deal with, I also worked in health care. Yep. But understanding and knowing it, those types of things, I think, could help people tremendously from even just, like, a performance standpoint. I mean, maybe we seem to care so much in this country about productivity. Yeah. You could speak volumes about how that could help productivity as
Tian Philson:
well. Sure. But you know what? I love how you painted a very vivid picture for me. I’m literally picturing you, like, getting this, this physical
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Cue. Yeah. That’s like, you know what? It’s time for me to implement something different. So like you said, you mentioned burnout. Yeah. But you said it’s time for me to implement something different, and you took it upon yourself to create a space for you to, you know, shift from all that heavy head work into somebody, integration, some somatic work. So for those that because, like, for me, I’m like, oh my gosh. I see it.
Tian Philson:
I can visualize it. I get it. I feel it. What were some of the feelings or sensations, or how did you know? How did you know so that you could make that connection?
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. For me, it’s it’s kind of like it feels like I’ve just stepped off of a carousel that’s
Tian Philson:
been just going too fast. Yep.
Amy Vaughn:
And I feel it’s kind of a dizzy feeling, but I haven’t been moving. I’ve literally been sitting still. Yep. And so it’s like I need to actually kind of either sit and be still or even just kind of, like, go for a walk. Yep. Because I love walking meditations, actually.
Tian Philson:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
Because it’s like a movement, but then I’m not thinking. I once had a friend who used to go for runs with me. He asked me, so what do you think about when you’re running? Mhmm. And I was like, oh my gosh. I actually don’t. I’m not thinking about anything. It’s one of the few times where my brain actually stops when I’m running.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Good for you because mine is calculating my miles per hour rate, which at least it’s not thinking about, like, my to do list. Right. But it’s like it’s almost like a distraction or, like, a welcome distraction. But, anyway, that’s awesome that
Amy Vaughn:
you can surely though. Some people get a lot of ideas while they’re running. Some people do a lot of thinking while they’re running to process. Yep. So then other people like me detach. It’s like they ‘re running. So, like, I love to hike. And while I’m hiking, my mind will wander, and I tend to daydream a lot while I’m hiking.
Amy Vaughn:
But I’m not really, like, stressing or, like, thinking over things too much. So, yeah, I think it’s really kind of knowing, like, how your body is feeling, what that sensation is. Yeah. Give me that cue that, yeah, okay, me. It’s time to get off the carousel. Yeah. And find the thing that needs to be done. And I’ve shared this before too. We had, I think it was when I was with, with, doctor Aquina Boateng, several episodes ago now. She’s a clinical psychologist as well.
Amy Vaughn:
We talked about that kind of balance of ambition and wellness. And, I had shared something with her. I think it was in that episode where my therapist was like, take your hands and, like, place them on the top of your head. Like, I could do this in a meeting. This is something I could do so that even if I can’t take that walk break or that meditation break, putting my hands on top of my head kind of slows that spinning sensation down because the weight grounds my body and my seat a little bit more. Yeah. Even just doing it right now as we’re sitting here, it does. It helps me feel a little bit more safe, a little more grounded.
Amy Vaughn:
And I could do it while I’m talking to people in the middle of a meeting, and it’s kind of like it doesn’t throw any weird signals body language wise, but it gives me that calming sensation. Isn’t that wild?
Tian Philson:
I’m putting that in my pocket, honey. Right? Like, seriously, I am putting that in my pocket. Here’s the other thing that I’m sensing from that. And, you know, like you said, we might have moved into a part of the conversation that feels woo for some, but I really believe that there is something physiological.
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah.
Tian Philson:
And the part of it that I’m connecting to is chakra energy. And so this is your crown chakra right up here. And so when you put your hands up there Mhmm. I mean, I’m not gonna try to get into the science of it at the moment, but to me, the grounding, I think, is absolutely real. I felt the weight of that, and I felt the weight of, like, myself settling into my seat. But, also, I think that when you’re expending a lot of, like, mental churn energy, there is a physical, kind of, like, over rotation sensation. And so I think you’re I think this is my belief, and this is probably the reason why I also love inversions
Amy Vaughn:
Yes.
Tian Philson:
Right, when my head is planted on the floor I think that you’re grounding your chakra energy.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Because for me I loved listening to you describe your sensations. It gave me, like, it shined a light on some of mine as well.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
I absolutely agree with the feeling of spinning. I used to tell my husband, I feel like I’ve been in a spin cycle of a washing machine. That’s how I would describe it. Mhmm. There’s that. The other indicator is when I sit down or lie down, but I can’t be still.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
I can’t stop moving. Like, I’m trying to be still, and I physically and energetically can’t stop moving.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
The other thing is I tend to experience headaches, and the headaches feel different than the typical headaches. They tend to be more, like, in my eyes or more towards the front of my head. Yeah. And so, yeah, just having that awareness of what are some of your physical sensations and physical cues, I think, is a really good way too. And so if you are, for days on end, feeling this way or, like, in the heat of a day, learning how to slow down and how to get into your body and how to do some of those very subtle things to your point. Mhmm. I, you know, love to ground my feet. I’m actually so I put my seat up a little bit higher so I because my desk is tall.
Tian Philson:
But I knew that if my seat was high, then my feet wouldn’t touch the floor, so I put 2 yoga blocks under my feet. So, like, I’m grounding my feet, but I really love your idea and your recommendation of, like, grounding from the top of your head. And I think if we all had those little tips and tricks
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
It would at least help us slow down during the course of a day and perhaps get into the habit of doing it throughout the day or, like, each week, you’ve got something that you can lean into.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. We have to not acknowledge how overstimulated we are as a society now with the amount of information we have coming at us now Mhmm. Compared to past generations,
Tian Philson:
for sure. I was thinking about that for sure. Mhmm. And, like, you know, just thinking about today’s conversation. So you’re right. It’s like it sends us into mental, emotional, and energetic overdrive. And I think Yeah. Finding ways to bring yourself back to presence and body and mind body integration, I think, are critical.
Amy Vaughn:
On that note, like, as people because you mentioned the woundus, so that’s probably one of them. But are there any other misconceptions that you would say there are out there about sourcing power from within?
Tian Philson:
I mean, honestly, yeah, we’re a great place to insert that thought, that question. I think of the misconception so often, I just think there’s a lack of awareness of just how much of our power comes from within. I think that our body, our mind, you know, head, heart, gut, I think it’s sending us signals all the time. And I think because we’re so overstimulated from everything that’s coming at us, from everything we’re absorbing externally, I think we miss I think we miss the internal signals
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. A lot.
Tian Philson:
I think we miss those whisperings that say, you said yes to that activity when you really meant no. Mhmm. Or, you know, you said no out of fear. But, really, if you challenge that fear, you’d actually want to say yes. Mhmm. I think that we’re constantly getting signals from ourselves, and it’s just really hard with the influx of all this stuff that’s coming at us. Yeah. To slow down and tune into them. And that’s where the practices come in.
Tian Philson:
And to your point, it doesn’t matter if it’s a walking practice. I love walking practices.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
A stillness practice, a journaling practice, a climbing practice. Mhmm. Yoga I mean, it can be anything, something that helps you integrate your mind and body and kind of rebalance to your point because sometimes you’re heavy on one side and light on the other. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
I love that. That’s so great. I love it. And, again, there’s no right or wrong. I think that’s the other thing. People seem to think that there’s one anecdote, one right answer for that, and it’s like, no. You just have to kind of play and try and do and then figure it out because we’ve talked about meditation and stillness, and people are like, oh god. I can’t sit still.
Amy Vaughn:
I can’t do that.
Amy Vaughn:
It’s
Amy Vaughn:
like, okay. Well, let’s throw the can out of there, and it’s like, okay. Try a walking meditation to start.
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And then build that into at the end, I have found, oh my gosh. Some of my best meditations have been after a long walk.
Amy Vaughn:
When I like, my blood is flowing and things are circulating, and I’m outside, and I’m
Amy Vaughn:
maybe, like, I stopped in, like, a near, like, wooded area, and I’m in the trees and
Tian Philson:
Oh my gosh. Nature.
Amy Vaughn:
Around. Yeah. And I’m, like, on the ground. It’s just, like, those are some of the best, you know, meditation. So it’s, like, play. Try it. And don’t again, it’s called a practice for a reason. You know? It’s just because you’re just going at it, and each session is gonna be different than the other.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
And
Amy Vaughn:
it’s never gonna be the same, and it’s never just gonna be, oh, I’ve done it. I’ve accomplished the perfect meditation. I’ve never needed to do this again.
Tian Philson:
Right. Right. All of that. Everything that you said. I mean, one, things are gonna be different and resonate differently for different people, and I think it’s so important to honor that. Mhmm. I think the best question that we can ask ourselves is, like, what do I need right now, or in what ways am I able to hear
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
The signals, the messages from my myself, from my body, my head, my heart, and my gut? I think answering that gives us clues. And then the other piece to your point, I love the word play, is play. Because what I need on Monday is probably not necessarily what I need on Tuesday or what I need in the morning versus the evening. And so having a whole toolkit is so important and exploring and re-exploiting too. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Thank
Tian Philson:
you. One interesting thing when it comes to yoga is so there’s 8 limbs of yoga. And within that, there is the practice of the asana, and there’s also the practice of the meditation. And in the 8 limbs of yoga, the asana, the yoga poses actually come before the meditation, and the reason why is because the movement of the body Mhmm. Is what helps prime
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
The mind and the body are ready for stillness.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And so just to think about that as, like, there is a progression for a reason. And so for people that say, I can’t sit still and meditate
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
I mean, to your point, I agree. Like, I don’t know that I would say can’t, but I would ask, is that what you need right now? Perhaps what you need is just something slower than the 100 miles per hour that you’re running.
Amy Vaughn:
Right.
Tian Philson:
Like, maybe you just need to slow it down from a run to a
Amy Vaughn:
walk. Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
Right? And then a walk to a stand and a stand to a sit. You know what I mean? Like, it’s Yeah. It’s progressive, and it’s also different for everyone.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. Yeah. And like you said earlier, it’s okay to get messy.
Tian Philson:
Messy.
Amy Vaughn:
And on the note of getting messy, I think it’s always good to share
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
So that other people would know it’s okay. So I was wondering if you could share a personal messy moment from your own journey where, ultimately, it led to some growth.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Okay. So it’s funny because Messi has become such a, something I hold so near and dear to my heart that I don’t know that I always pick out a messy moment. Like, to me, it’s just life. Yeah. Like, at this point, it’s just life. Mhmm. But one, I think that just yesterday so this is still fresh in my mind.
Tian Philson:
A beautifully messy moment. I had the honor of being the keynote speaker for NextUp Cincinnati yesterday. Right. And thank you. I had such a well organized plan down to, like, you know, what was gonna fit into what time chunk and when we were gonna do whatever, like, interactive exercise. Mhmm. And right out the gate, the mic wouldn’t work for me. Like, I don’t know what I was doing, but every time I shifted it, it went out.
Tian Philson:
And so we tried with that for, like, 2 or 3 minutes and finally just ditched the mic. It was messy. My interactive activities were not cooperating the way that I thought they would. Like, inevitably, things are never gonna go exactly according to plan. And to me, it wasn’t a stressful mess, but it was a knowledgeable mess to be like, this is not going according to all the pieces of things that I have on my sheet, but I was able to just really embrace that with a lot of self compassion.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
And what happened at the end of that is people said, thank you so much for modeling what you coach on. I heard that from several, several, several people. Thank you for modeling what you coach on and that, like, this does not have to be perfect. We don’t have to, like, lose our shit and get stressed out about it. Like, we can embrace it. And, also, it gives others permission to show up with authenticity and be like, I am not the first person who couldn’t figure out why the mic wouldn’t work or couldn’t get their system to change the way it’s supposed to. And so giving people permission to show up more authentically and messy, I think that’s a really recent example. And I think the growth in that is me getting to ask myself, okay.
Tian Philson:
So would you wanna change anything about that? Or, you know, like, would I change my technology? I mean, maybe tweaks, but not changes. Right? And then the other part is I think about my journey as a yoga teacher. And in the beginning, I really wanted to make sure, like, everyone had a quality experience in the yoga session. And so that meant to me remembering the poses I had planned for them, getting the lefts and rights together. You know what I mean? Because when you’re teaching yoga, I don’t know if people understand just how many things are going on in your mind at the same time. It’s, like, supposed to be this very very zenful practice. But, also, I’m watching, like, 12 different mats and trying to keep everyone safe in their body alignment and trying to make sure, like, hey. We move through a flow that makes sense for how our body wants to experience.
Tian Philson:
Like, some poses don’t make sense to put before other poses because the body’s not ready. So, anyway, the point is I used to get really tangled up in, like, trying to make that really smooth for people. And, when I learned to embrace the messiness of it, I learned to laugh with it. I learned to have a lot of compassion for myself and also to just, again, model what I was hoping to bring to the mat, which is like, hey, guys. We forgot an entire side of the body. We’re gonna rewind, and we’re gonna do all of that now just like life. Like, it’s not gonna go according to plan, and you can just, like, be really gentle with yourself and laugh about it. And, like, it’s not that serious.
Amy Vaughn:
It’s just not. It’s not. This is what I want you all to remember because I feel like I love this is the writer Amy coming out, and it’s like that alliteration, right, of the 3 m’s. When you let things get messy and you let other people see it, you’re modeling the behavior. Right? You’re allowed by modeling. And you’re making yourself memorable. How much more memorable was your talk from yesterday? How many more people are gonna walk away remembering you now because you allowed that to happen? Right?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Got those same compliments and comments maybe from the talk if you hadn’t had that messy moment and then modeled the behavior?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. My heart’s my heart is, like, buzzing right now, and it’s saying you’re spot on. That’s what it’s saying right now. It’s like you’re spot on. Yeah. Because, like, had I walked in there and everything had been perfect, I don’t know that they would have gotten the same demonstration. Yeah. Right? And it I will say too, the mindset shift says, like, when I walked out of there, instead of feeling, discouraged by any of that, I was thankful to the universe to be like, well, thanks for giving me real time
Amy Vaughn:
Uh-huh.
Tian Philson:
You know, opportunity to show that because I didn’t have that in my plan.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
I did not have in my plan to, like, demonstrate what it feels like to keep calm under stress.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah.
Tian Philson:
So the universe provided that for me. Yeah. You know? And so I was grateful instead of, you know, lamenting any part of it.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. Let it be messy. Model it.
Tian Philson:
Let it be messy.
Amy Vaughn:
Make yourself memorable.
Tian Philson:
Yep. I like them. Yeah. I like that.
Amy Vaughn:
Well, and it reminds me too of that practice of nonattachment. Right? Non Attachment to outcome, which is one of my favorites.
Tian Philson:
So hard, but it’s so good.
Amy Vaughn:
It is. It really is whenever because if you are, you know, like me, and I feel like we’re similar in this way, Diane, of just, like, being somebody who likes to plan and, you know, host and provide experiences for people, and you do. You often have a desired outcome. Yep. This comes for a lot of us too. Women that get put in the seat of being the host. You’re planning parties, vacations, things like that. And so you have this dream, this vision Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Of the day and how things will go. And it’s like, oftentimes, you don’t get to be present and there for the moment when you are attached to the outcome. But if you can learn to let that go and just be there for the moment and be present
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
Whatever kind of comes your way, you can really respond and then receive.
Tian Philson:
Yeah. In such a different way. Yeah. It’s the yeah. I love that. Respond and receive. I make a joke all the time now because my husband is actually really good at being present for the moment. Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
And his number one message, I feel like, or one of his superpowers is pivot. Yeah. And you can’t pivot if you are holding on to the way and the outcome that you thought it was going to be. Mhmm. And so, yes, respond and receive. I like that.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. Now that you’ve been coaching for a while, I would love to talk a little bit about how you’ve been able to help some of your clients evolve. Yes. Could you give us an example of a transformative moment when a client that you were able to witness a client when they have Yeah. Been able to truly tap into their inner power?
Tian Philson:
Alright. Are we back? Can you hear me?
Amy Vaughn:
Yep. You’re good.
Tian Philson:
Okay. I think I lost my mic for a second. You’re all good. I heard your question, the transformative moment. Mhmm. So, yeah, the transformative moment, it happens over and over again. Literally, my clients start coaching themselves. That’s what happens in our sessions.
Amy Vaughn:
Like
Amy Vaughn:
The coachee becomes the coach. That’s, like, that means you’re doing a good job, Diane.
Tian Philson:
It means they’re putting in the work too. Right? Yep. Like, I give them so much credit because, like, I was with a client this week, and we were having a time for reflection. And it’s beautiful because it’s often very organic. I don’t always say, okay. This coaching session is gonna be our reflective coaching session. No. I come in and ask them, like, what do they want to talk about today? And she started reflecting.
Tian Philson:
And when she did, she started highlighting her key takeaways, and then she started asking herself, like, the next question. Yeah. And I’m like, well, that’s what I would typically do. Yeah. Right? But she did it, and I just sat back and was like, girl. I love it. Yeah. And it’s like, that’s the moment.
Tian Philson:
It’s like, well, she’s like, well, I came into you thinking about x and thinking I want it y. She’s like, but now after this time that we’ve spent together, I’ve come to realize and then she’s like, which makes me wonder. And it’s like she literally guided herself through it, and it’s beautiful because we are toward the end of our coaching Yeah. Our formal coaching, you know, agreement relationship together. And I’m just, like, sitting here and, and I told her, I was like, girl, I don’t even know if you need me anymore. She’s like, no. No. No.
Tian Philson:
Not so fast. Not yet. But Right. It’s beautiful. That’s what happens when they start to coach themselves. They start to see their own transformation, and they tell me what they saw. It’s not about me telling them what I see. It’s about them telling me, like,
Amy Vaughn:
how
Tian Philson:
they’ve gotten from point a to b to c to d, and that’s really beautiful. Yeah. Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Is there one I know? It’s so hard to pick out anyone, and we don’t have to name names or anything. But, like, do you feel like there’s been, like, a big, pivotal shift for anyone in particular having gone from point a to point b that you were not expecting to see a kind of, like, a big shift or pivot?
Tian Philson:
I can’t say that I wasn’t expecting to see. I believe in the magic of it. I really do. And so I can’t say I wasn’t expecting to see it. I think that, one in particular that’s coming to mind for me is, like, she’s someone I love dearly and I respect so much for, like
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Tian Philson:
How she approaches her craft and how she approaches her work. And she always, like, comes ready, like, ready for the conversation, having done her own reflections and her own kind of, like, stepping back. And then it’s the magic that happens outside of the coaching session. And the pivotal shift, I think, is when she comes into a session and I mean, she ‘s like her whole energy shifted from, like, asking me and being like, what do you think about such and such to being like, well, here’s how I’m solving these questions for myself. Like, she just came. I mean, it’s the same thing in a way, but I’m thinking about a very specific person. It’s like, here’s how I’m solving this for myself now. And instead of her looking to me for the answers Yeah. She said, I know I have the tools now.
Tian Philson:
Uh-huh. She said, I know I have the tools now. And she’s like, I see I see the thing that I was seeking before. It’s here. It’s already here, and I just need to keep doing the work. And I was like, ah. It it makes me so happy, but it also makes me sad because it means that
Amy Vaughn:
we won’t be having,
Tian Philson:
like, as a regular of connections.
Amy Vaughn:
Right.
Tian Philson:
But it’s so beautiful.
Amy Vaughn:
That is sweet.
Tian Philson:
It is. It is.
Amy Vaughn:
Well, and it’s one of those things I’ve said to people so many times, like, don’t outsource your knowledge. Don’t outsource your knowledge. But it is such a hard thing, you know, to to not do that, to not, you know, just kind of seek, affirmation and to just, you know, consult everyone in the world about every little thing
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Yeah. To pull the audience. You know? But at some point, it’s like you can’t, you can’t do that for every little thing. And life moves so much faster and smoother when you’re working in alignment to what your values and your beliefs and your strengths are.
Amy Vaughn:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
You know? But I think that does take that takes time, that takes intention, that takes slowing down, that takes guidance, which is why it’s awesome to have folks like you, Diane
Amy Vaughn:
Thank you.
Amy Vaughn:
That has this experience, this, like, strength and, you know, frameworks that just really help people kind of find that for themselves.
Tian Philson:
Mhmm.
Amy Vaughn:
And, you know, they can kind of guide them to that and get them into that space. Alright. We are gonna do a fun little lightning style power round set of questions. Uh-huh. And if our live listening audience has any questions for Tyan, we’ll get to those before we wrap after the power round. Other than that, we will finish it up for the day. But this has been so much fun. So thank you again.
Tian Philson:
Thank you for having me.
Amy Vaughn:
I’m excited for us to get together. We’re probably gonna hang out and do some yoga here soon. So Yes.
Tian Philson:
You can come to my space up here in Coleraine, or you can bring me to your space and where you like to go. Yeah. Both are viable options.
Amy Vaughn:
Absolutely. Absolutely. Alright. So here we go. Are you ready? Yeah. Okay. What is your go to practice for quickly centering yourself?
Tian Philson:
I feel my feet. Mhmm. I feel my seat. I am breathing. I love it.
Amy Vaughn:
You can
Tian Philson:
do it anywhere. I feel my feet. I feel my seat. I am breathing.
Amy Vaughn:
Love it. Corporate job or coaching, which is more challenging and why?
Tian Philson:
This is a hard, hard question asking people about lightning. I might give you another answer, but I would say it’s actually now. The coaching, the entrepreneurial side, the business building side of the coaching is actually harder. You’ve got so much more to figure out, but it’s actually so much more rewarding. I’m happy to put in twice the time that I was putting in before.
Amy Vaughn:
I feel that. I feel that. It’s a different kind of hard. Right?
Tian Philson:
Yep.
Amy Vaughn:
It’s a different kind of challenge. Yep. If you could give your younger self one piece of advice, what would it be?
Tian Philson:
Let it be messy.
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, yeah. Do you
Amy Vaughn:
have that on a t- shirt yet? If not, we’re getting you one.
Tian Philson:
No. But you know what? So up here in our center, like, we do. We, I’m gonna thank you.
Amy Vaughn:
I mean,
Tian Philson:
I’d welcome. Accept any gift you give me, but, actually, that is something that we could put together, and I think people will resonate with it. It’s part of our business that we offer.
Amy Vaughn:
I love it. Love it. What’s the most unexpected lesson yoga has taught you about leadership?
Tian Philson:
How much of the answers are already within me?
Amy Vaughn:
Love that.
Tian Philson:
Yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Alright. Finish this sentence. True empowerment is?
Tian Philson:
True empowerment is letting go. Oh, that’s so good. True empowerment is letting go.
Amy Vaughn:
Oh, talk about that tingles there. That’s good stuff. Good stuff. My goodness. Well, I can’t wait to hang out some more, like, yoga. We talked about a wellness event that’s coming up. What’s that? Next weekend?
Tian Philson:
Yeah. The yeah. The Power to Pursue Wellness Summit, which I get to go and participate in. That’s gonna be amazing. And I’ve got yoga here every Thursday and sometimes, a special event class. So I hope to see you and anyone who’s interested. I love live engagement. I love it.
Tian Philson:
Yes. So yeah.
Amy Vaughn:
Yes. So, Cincinnati friends, be sure to check out those awesome, awesome events that are happening. Let me check our chat, regarding the aforementioned spin. Oh, awesome. Elizabeth, thank you for your question. Can you tell the difference between what could be potentially, a positive spin and a negative spin? Oh. That’s a good question.
Tian Philson:
That is such a good question. I think that a positive spin makes me tingle with excitement and possibility. Mhmm. I think a negative spin leaves me, to your point, Amy, dizzy. And, it literally does not feel good in my body.
Amy Vaughn:
Yep. Yeah. Negative spin, I think, feels like it stays in my head
Tian Philson:
Yep.
Amy Vaughn:
Where the positive spin and it kind of leaves me, like, short of breath. Yeah. And the positive spin, it kind of, like, is more of like a whole body Yeah. Experience. And I feel more energized versus, like, like, out of breath.
Tian Philson:
Yep.
Amy Vaughn:
That’s how I would describe it. Yep. Great question, Elizabeth. I love that. There is a distinction for sure, and there can be a positive and a negative for sure. Yep. Alright, folks. Well, we’re out of time.
Amy Vaughn:
Be sure to follow Tian on LinkedIn. We will include, in her website, lsfwellness.com. We’ll include those in the chat. Live listeners, if you haven’t grabbed those yet, make sure you grab those before we close out. You can also find those in the show notes once this is posted up live. Thank you so much for being with us here today. Appreciate you.
Tian Philson:
Thank you all for being here, Amy. Thank you for having me and for such a rich conversation. I love learning more about you. Like, this was amazing.
Amy Vaughn:
Ditto. Ditto. Alright, everyone. Have a fantastic rest of your Friday. Thank you so much for taking time to join us. Until then, everyone, we’ll see you next week, and keep asking, keep giving, and keep growing. See you next week. Bye.
Amy Vaughn:
Bye.
