2022 is upon us, and the greatest gift of the last two years has been that I have stopped being meaninglessly busy doing the things that do not fulfill me. If I am busy, you can bet it is something that is building the life, career, business, family, and world I want.
I found fulfillment somewhere between intention and gratitude. And while not everything may result as I intend (thank you non-attachment), I am forever grateful for the time I have and efforts I can give.
How did I get here you ask?
But first, you should know, the world has taught us how to make goals and resolutions all wrong—especially women.
After spending last year workshopping, creating, revisiting, and revising my goals in 2021 – I want to share the top 5 mistakes women make when setting goals to set you up for progress.
#1 Your Goal Does Not Match Your Values
Before you put pen to paper, finger to keyboard, or even say a potential goal out loud, ask yourself: who says this “should” be my goal? If the answer is not YOU, then scrap it now. Make sure your goals align with who you are or who you want to be – not what everyone else expects of you. Otherwise, you risk feeling unfulfilled once that goal is achieved, or worse, never reach it. As a dear friend and fellow Together Digital member once relayed, always be asking yourself, “who’s ‘should’ is it” mine or someone else?
#2 Forgoing a Reality Check On Your Goal
Every big dream starts with a tiny step. When creating goals for yourself – do us both a favor and be realistic. Consider creating goals that are not an “end goal” but a way to your ideal state. So rather than make your goal to “run a successful business” (ideal state). Instead, create a goal of “take a business class” or “write a business plan.” Even after you write your goal – remember it’s not set in stone. But, rather than write it off – oh, I don’t know, when a pandemic comes along. Re-address your goals often and adjust them to meet your ideal end state.
#3 Not Making Time to Achieve Them (Boundaries, Baby)
I once heard that discipline = freedom, and my free-loving self just about flipped a table. But the more I sat with the thought, the more I realized that nothing happens if you don’t make time for it. For example, routine and time-boxing have become my goal-bustin’ BFFs. By creating boundaries in my day and schedule – surprise – I have time to chip away at my goals a little each day. As they always say, we have the same 24-hours in a day as Beyonce.
#4 You Lack Accountability
Goal-setting’s best friend is a healthy dose of self-awareness. Knowing what keeps you on track is a great way to set up your accountability plan. For example – me and working out. Unless it is family-centric, fun, and outdoors, I need someone I can be accountable to. Like if I don’t show up, they’ll be pissed or, worse, charge me, which is why a plain old gym membership will never do, and even group classes don’t make the cut. I need to know my trainer is there and waiting on my lazy, overslept ass. Know what keeps you accountable and put it into action.
#5 You Don’t Celebrate the Small Wins
Sometimes I am torn as to who had more expectations of us as women – the world or ourselves. Of course, that’s a whole other article, but either way, the world will not always show us grace, but you can show yourself some all day, every day. So, as you work toward your ideal state through goals, make sure you stop and celebrate even the small wins. Even if it’s just a monetary looking back on what you’ve accomplished and a mental pat on the back.
I can’t say enough about leveraging a group of like-minded communities to help you in times of trouble and doubt. As we all know, priorities, jobs, and life will change, but a good community can be your constant. So find the right one for you and invest some time there. You won’t regret it.
May 13, 2022
Authentic, meaningful, value-based goal-setting, followed by support from our amazing virtual peer circles and online community.